tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post226905772159765660..comments2023-10-10T03:57:29.110-07:00Comments on Razing Ruth: Playing with the layout.Razing Ruthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04854418022850278216noreply@blogger.comBlogger73125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-53000596105533556582012-01-24T09:58:27.900-08:002012-01-24T09:58:27.900-08:00Hi Ruth,
I hope all is well and that you are enjoy...Hi Ruth,<br />I hope all is well and that you are enjoying your new semester in college. Update us when you can, but please don't feel any pressure to do so. <br /><br />DreaDreahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04020053333476605856noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-57205725241395997232012-01-21T10:35:06.969-08:002012-01-21T10:35:06.969-08:00Hope all is well.Hope all is well.Kris Onoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-5917260749851600102012-01-20T15:23:05.104-08:002012-01-20T15:23:05.104-08:00Ruth, I have read your blog often enough to cry ev...Ruth, I have read your blog often enough to cry every time I read it, and to pray that the Lord, the real Jesus Christ will make himself known to you. That he will comfort and sustain you and give you the confidence and strength to make your decisions. God be with you Ruth.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-50650337927909621272012-01-19T19:19:21.259-08:002012-01-19T19:19:21.259-08:00Nice article, thanks for sharing.Nice article, thanks for sharing.rental mobil jakartahttp://griyamobilkita.webs.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-35494965875819849242012-01-16T16:30:10.005-08:002012-01-16T16:30:10.005-08:00Ruth
because we share a similar background I have ...Ruth<br />because we share a similar background I have often come to your blog. DO NOT listen to your parents God is not cursing you mine told me the same thing. I have to force myself to look around me and see that the economy sucks right now and alot of people are struggling right now. I am so so sorry about Harris I was hoping that you would finally have a happy ending. Relationships and first loves teach us alot about ourselves and life they help us grow and develop. Take time to grieve, time to remember and time to accept yourself.<br />Shalom,'<br />AnnaAnnanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-54324050558922165362012-01-12T07:30:50.954-08:002012-01-12T07:30:50.954-08:00@ victoria - Thanks. I'll look that up.@ victoria - Thanks. I'll look that up.Michael Mockhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06233321050691782148noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-59078052209229331002012-01-11T11:51:12.278-08:002012-01-11T11:51:12.278-08:00@Michael Mock- Lots Of Kids= Spiritual Box Tops
G...@Michael Mock- Lots Of Kids= Spiritual Box Tops<br /><br />Great analogyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-90198548229212836802012-01-11T08:33:51.244-08:002012-01-11T08:33:51.244-08:00Way to go MM and the dude up top who addresses DD ...Way to go MM and the dude up top who addresses DD father to father....well written.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-88962434521427837002012-01-10T18:23:21.540-08:002012-01-10T18:23:21.540-08:00@Michael -- You might be interested in a book by E...@Michael -- You might be interested in a book by Elaine Pagels called Adam, Eve, and the Serpent. It traces the origins of Christian thought on marriage and sexuality through about the time of Augustine. The one thing that was abundantly clear to me from reading it: there has never, historically, been a consensus on what the Bible calls Christians to do in terms of sexuality (at least, never a consensus that lasted for very long). Celibacy was definitely considered the more virtuous option for centuries and centuries after the Bible was written -- even by people who were married.<br /><br />And Ruth -- I wish you a good semester! I always enjoy reading your blog.victorianoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-34373679030892265542012-01-10T17:10:37.824-08:002012-01-10T17:10:37.824-08:00Ruth, I'm sorry the last month has been so exh...Ruth, I'm sorry the last month has been so exhausting for you. <br /><br />I'm glad that you were able to get the essentials with your tip jar (seriously, coffee is necessary in college). <br /><br />Trolls happen. Eff 'em. IP logging can help (basically, it shows where someone's coming from, and helps to pinpoint "hot" trolling spots if they use multiple names). Banning can help. Otherwise, ignore them. If they're not Gothardites they're bored or easily enraged twits. It's not worth your time to engage with them.<br /><br />I hope this is a good semester for you. Take care, spend time with friends, and have fun. :)Sheenahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11366638376991975702noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-19480322677684820682012-01-10T06:49:58.490-08:002012-01-10T06:49:58.490-08:00Completely off-topic, but I wanted to post a follo...Completely off-topic, but I wanted to post a follow-up note for Gotharddad. <br /><br />After three days of study and contemplation, I have yet to find a clear and Godly model for marriage. In fact, here in the New Covenant, the Godly model for marriage appears to be complete celibacy, with marriage as a fallback plan for those who aren't strong enough to remain celibate. So already I'm seeing that there's more than one way to live a Godly life, which seems to contradict your assertion that there's only one "Model" which is obvious to anyone who prays over it. <br /><br />Secondarily, in regard to Psalm 127 specifically, yes: it does say that children are a reward and a blessing. (Taken as a whole, that psalm appears to say that therefore you shouldn't let your work come between you and your family - but still, children are a reward and a blessing.) Even so, there's a difference between "happy is the man with many children" and "you should always have as many children as possible, regardless of circumstance."<br /><br />There's also... I don't know, maybe I'm misreading you on this, but you seem to imply that having lots of children encourages God to shower you with other blessings, as if children were some sort of spiritual boxtops that you save up in order to send off for prizes. If that is what you believe, then I disagree: as far as I can see from contemplating the Bible, children are a reward <em>in themselves</em>, not a means of obtaining further blessings.Michael Mockhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06233321050691782148noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-21693697948812743092012-01-09T19:20:46.596-08:002012-01-09T19:20:46.596-08:00"So much better than a landfill and a great w..."So much better than a landfill and a great way to get anything from egg crates to treadmills!"<br /><br />Egg crates...the best modular storage "furniture" ever!<br /><br />We were able to "organize" STUFF because of FREECYCLE.<br /><br />BTORSPAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-16351619545801971102012-01-09T18:08:56.638-08:002012-01-09T18:08:56.638-08:00I'm going to second FREECYCLE. Most of my fri...I'm going to second FREECYCLE. Most of my friends donate stuff that way. It's a great way to say "I had this couch but I finally saved up and got some big girl furniture and have no room for this perfectly nice but used sofa. <br /><br />So much better than a landfill and a great way to get anything from egg crates to treadmills!<br /><br />Study Hard! I know there was an issue with working in the past, but is work study in the library a possibility now? As a book lover, it might be a great way to go if you are still thinking about library science.Cynthianoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-65089091527354554682012-01-09T16:24:16.984-08:002012-01-09T16:24:16.984-08:00I think another thing that would greatly help is a...I think another thing that would greatly help is a dedicated tab to your story with specific links to blog posts that tell the story of your courtship.lucrezaborgianoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-4544095307865601302012-01-09T16:22:14.155-08:002012-01-09T16:22:14.155-08:00"Some people have nothing better to do than c..."Some people have nothing better to do than cowardly hide behind an anonymous tag "<br /><br />They can try to hide. I seriously doubt that most trolls know how to hide their location. Blogspot tracks IP's and here is how you find out where they are coming from: http://tools.whois.net/whoisbyip/<br /><br />That's just the free stuff! I highly suggest you start posting IP addresses of trolls so other people can automatically block them as well.lucrezaborgianoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-10076955572650501982012-01-09T15:58:48.720-08:002012-01-09T15:58:48.720-08:00Montana Wildflower said: "I also think, now l...Montana Wildflower said: "I also think, now looking in hindsight, that my ex is a closet gay man. He had so much self-loathing and persisted so much in seeking "righteousness" that I think it was an attempt to subconsciously deny his leanings. Part of that denial was to keep up the aggressive behavior in hopes that others wouldn't clue it in."<br /><br />This is an interesting insight. I don't know if I would go that far in a general statement for all narcissistic men, but I would say that domination and chauvinism are socially acceptable behaviors through which narcissism can be expressed. Men get into these systems because they find affirmation for their own feelings and perspectives. When they don't measure up in that system, they fear that others will view them as lesser men. So those who are concerned about their masculinity do tend to become more aggressive and more controlling.<br /><br />Narcissists are often viewed as powerful and confident, but they are far from both. The cruel behavior is meant to cover up their insecurities and distract from what they think of themselves. <br /><br />KrisO said: "As Ruth reads up on NPD she will undoubtedly discover that her mom is drawn to a narcissistic partner for her own self esteem issues and shortcomings." Absolutely! This is a symbiotic relationship. Yet, mom is the one who is losing herself. Mom is in danger, I believe. She may be able to get through life this way. Others have, partly because of the community support. But she is still a victim, at least a victim of the system.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-70978809749381012422012-01-09T14:58:11.259-08:002012-01-09T14:58:11.259-08:00Just a note.....lots of people have trouble with m...Just a note.....lots of people have trouble with making decisions and then second guess themselves over whether or not they made good ones. <br /><br />But, you know what Ruth? They are YOUR decisions. You take the credit or you take the blame, but in the end, you fought for your freedom to make them and that is wonderful. <br /><br />Perhaps I can offer some insight on your mom. I too, was married to a narcissistic man. I am sure we would have had a blissful marriage if I had been content to tow his line for me. I did for a few years and then when I turned 30, I realized how unhappy I was. <br /><br />Had it not been for a will that was instilled in my from a very young age, from both my mother and my aunties, I could have easily allowed him to bully me, thinking myself deserving of that just by virtue of being his "helpmeet." <br /><br />I also think, now looking in hindsight, that my ex is a closet gay man. He had so much self-loathing and persisted so much in seeking "righteousness" that I think it was an attempt to subconsciously deny his leanings. Part of that denial was to keep up the aggressive behavior in hopes that others wouldn't clue it in. <br /><br />I'm not saying this is true for your dad, but I do think men are under an enormous amount of pressure in super- conservative circles to be in control at all times, and if there is even a whiff of being out of control, then there are those who will question their masculinity. The very idea of this to some men, I do believe, contributes very heavily for these men to be abusive. And, for someone who may be gay, since masculinity is akin to being godly, well, you can see where the self-hatred can come in.<br /><br />If a woman enters a relationship such as this, and has no tools and has never been encouraged to call the bluff of an abusive person or system, and furthermore, if she is instructed to "just be sweet" in an effort to 'make' her husband stop abusing her by using her example of godly womanhood, then she's doomed to live a life where she makes no decisions and nothing is ever really 'hers,' not even her own walk with Christ.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-62256707788370974882012-01-09T12:50:12.762-08:002012-01-09T12:50:12.762-08:00OOPS.
That would be "people."
Also Rut...OOPS.<br /><br />That would be "people."<br /><br />Also Ruth...have you ever heard of online "Freecycle." See if you have one in your area. <br /><br />We have been able to "help and receive" with this online resource: from clothes to textbooks to linens, to furniture, FREECYCLE has helped our group tremendously, and allowed us to help others.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-60041727250047379162012-01-09T12:43:49.729-08:002012-01-09T12:43:49.729-08:00Snerk. Godless coffee fiends here. God Loving coff...Snerk. Godless coffee fiends here. God Loving coffee fiends there...<br /><br />...Coffee fiends EVERYWHERE!<br /><br />Ruth hangs out with some cool online peple.oAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-46776571396859887022012-01-09T12:15:26.013-08:002012-01-09T12:15:26.013-08:00I've been harsh in my criticism of Ruth's ...I've been harsh in my criticism of Ruth's mom and while her actions, or in-actions rather, play as much of a role in Ruth's abusive upbringing I don't doubt that she loves Ruth. She's just too weak and abused herself to make a better life for her children. This I feel she will come to regret one day. I also believe Ruth loves her mom and is capable of holding her responsible where applicable. It's ok to be angry with those that we love. To ignore that anger would be unhealthy. As Ruth reads up on NPD she will undoubtedly discover that her mom is drawn to a narcissistic partner for her own self esteem issues and shortcomings. NPDs work best when they have a willing partner to do their bidding. Some say co-dependency and some say co-narcissism. So many terms for this typical coupling. Every pot has a lid, every cup has a saucer. If possible Ruth's mom should also read up on NPD. It might give her some strength and courage to find herself again. She's young enough to still have children so there is hope she can make a life of her own someday for herself, her children and Ruth.Kris Onoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-74307048073951112162012-01-09T11:14:30.965-08:002012-01-09T11:14:30.965-08:00Oh, and coffee is not only a legitimate college ex...Oh, and coffee is not only a legitimate college expense, it is an important part of a good day. I will certainly be putting something in the jar and I hope you will use it at Starbucks or for coffee in general!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-78070171263878739032012-01-09T10:59:05.317-08:002012-01-09T10:59:05.317-08:00Wow! The comment line is hot this weekend!
Two...Wow! The comment line is hot this weekend! <br /><br />Two things: First, it didn't sound like the troll was dad or someone close to him. Just a troll. These folks come to blogs and try to upset everyone. IMO<br /><br />Second, I would again encourage everyone to do a little study on narcissism. These folks are incapable of love as most of us know it. Their victims (read mom) become incapable of love also as the narcissist drains all energy and goodness away. Mom actually fits the pattern as much as Dad. Yes, she is responsible for her part or lack, just as Ruth has said, but we probably can't expect much more from her. <br /> <br />Narcissism and legalism are close siblings. They are often found together.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-57197603824804321302012-01-09T10:23:58.656-08:002012-01-09T10:23:58.656-08:00Your father is an ass.
I threw some in the tip jar...Your father is an ass.<br />I threw some in the tip jar. I don't really care what or where she spends it. She's an adult, and my choice to give money does not give me the right to dictate where she spends the money or to even judge it.<br /><br />I didn't read this blog for a month and look at all the activity... wow. perhaps a good thing, because I probably would have flamed your father.<br /><br />Keep your chin up and have a good semester.JTNnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-47698004780969746542012-01-09T09:57:20.253-08:002012-01-09T09:57:20.253-08:00I probably shouldn't fuel the fire but I want ...I probably shouldn't fuel the fire but I want to put in my two cents. I am a natural skeptic and while I tend to believe Ruth's story I will always have a little bit of doubt. That has not stopped me from making small donations because I still come here, read, and become more informed. If her story is not real than Ruth is quie the author and I'd pay for that too. Anyone who has cable and has watched reality TV should at least feel it is OK to donate. Reality TV is also based in truth but manipulated for entertainment. <br /><br />To Ruth: despite my skepticism I am sorry for what you are going through and wish you all the best.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-50853493911292023272012-01-09T09:19:32.331-08:002012-01-09T09:19:32.331-08:00I'm posting as anonymous because I have no des...I'm posting as anonymous because I have no desire to toot my own horn, but as someone who did put a little something in your tip jar I'm very glad you purchased some coffee- a must for college students to function- and some groceries. That's what it was for, to purchase what you needed. Hope your semester goes well!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com