tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post3061007833079616654..comments2023-10-10T03:57:29.110-07:00Comments on Razing Ruth: Interview with a gimpRazing Ruthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04854418022850278216noreply@blogger.comBlogger42125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-74449956444728318672013-03-16T22:13:45.364-07:002013-03-16T22:13:45.364-07:00i love reading these comments!!!! man!!! i love reading these comments!!!! man!!! arlinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11376123172643947634noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-68517394028717144302010-04-20T06:55:25.407-07:002010-04-20T06:55:25.407-07:00Act responsible and ORGANIZED. Be nice! Do not g...Act responsible and ORGANIZED. Be nice! Do not go in to the QF stuff. It will freak the Mom out. Bring you MVA record and emphisize you do not drink.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-69407370691662013602010-04-19T20:53:01.618-07:002010-04-19T20:53:01.618-07:00As a nanny, I always talk primarily to the mom. I ...As a nanny, I always talk primarily to the mom. I talk to the dad enough to be friendly and informative when the mom isn't around, but I act like the mom is my employer and the dad is my coworker who works in another department who I don't really have anything is common with. <br /><br />I have been a nanny for several families and this formula has ALWAYS worked for me. I do this to avoid the "Governess Syndrome" or even the suggestion of it. The best part is that families expect this. The mom expects to have every piece of info on their child and she will probably take an interest in you, so she expects you to talk to her. The dad will probably expect you to talk more to the mom than him. This is very sexist, but it works. <br /><br />As for the leg, joke around about it, and if you can, play with the kids during the interview. If the kids are not there, ask where they are. If you can't play with the kids, maybe you shouldn't be a nanny. I know you'll be great and if you get the cast off by summer, then it's not a problem and you should tell the parents when you interview.<br /><br />As for bringing up the QF background, bend the truth. Just enough so you can tell the truth later if you need to an you won't get caught in a lie. Say you come from a big family and have lots of childcare experience. Say you have experience with age groups from birth to adolecense and up to however many kids you've ever been the sole keeper of at a time before.Frannoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-12714581533605176982010-04-19T19:03:11.502-07:002010-04-19T19:03:11.502-07:00btw, i'm on care.com and gonanny.com and if yo...btw, i'm on care.com and gonanny.com and if you live in a highly populated area you'd probably find many people hiring on those sites.<br />there's also http://caregiverneeded.com/<br />which i think i was on the database once but am not now.Iktomihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06764173102454691516noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-41728666316880073382010-04-18T20:15:32.494-07:002010-04-18T20:15:32.494-07:00Great insights, all.
Am I the only one who saw th...Great insights, all.<br /><br />Am I the only one who saw the title of this post and thought of Pulp Fiction?DaveLnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-54372677599331243522010-04-18T17:40:34.740-07:002010-04-18T17:40:34.740-07:00Are you sure that husband comment meant the woman ...Are you sure that husband comment meant the woman was uncomfortable in an jealous way? It seems to me that with your very cult-like upbringing, you might have just talked to him in an unusual way. Maybe you deferred to him too much out of habit, or maybe you were aloof out of resentment. It might be jealousy, but it might be something else.bananacatnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-19060059411518220392010-04-18T13:52:24.302-07:002010-04-18T13:52:24.302-07:00Ruth,
If you happen to live in the Denver area, I&...Ruth,<br />If you happen to live in the Denver area, I'd totally let you live with us this summer, in exchange for a little part time nannying, while I sinfully work in the man's world of lawyering. I have no worries that you'd hit on my husband or vice versa, and I am pretty sure you are already better at mothering than I am, so none of that would be a concern, lol. <br />Also, this is one of my favorite new singer/artists, and she reminds me of you. She is a preacher's daughter, by the way . . .<br />http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3feCi-eRV4Y<br />If that link doesn't work, just google "youtube diane birch rise up"Rendyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10845250874246121952noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-47390653237059585452010-04-18T10:25:35.789-07:002010-04-18T10:25:35.789-07:00I wouldn't worry about the husband thing eithe...I wouldn't worry about the husband thing either. I think a lot of career women who hire nannies are afraid of losing their children and/or husband to women who fill the more traditional role. I worked as a nanny in high school and college and I had a few jobs that ended because the mother felt the children liked me more than her or that her husband liked the dinners I made too much. I even had one mother who stopped hiring me after I turned eighteen because she said I was no longer "jail bait" and therefore might tempt her husband to stray.....needless to say I was kind of glad to lose that position. <br />It's just hard to get a nanny position in general because the moms are trying to walk a delicate balance of getting the best person for the job but not someone who is better at it then they are, and some of them aren't the best mothers to start with which makes it even more difficult for the nanny to not outshine them while appearing competent. Good luck in your search though.Marie Francisnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-76090518127143866782010-04-18T07:20:55.036-07:002010-04-18T07:20:55.036-07:00Ugh, the "competition" angle. I only nan...Ugh, the "competition" angle. I only nannied for neighbors, so I never got that, but I heard about it from other nannies I met. Another thing to consider is that in houses where the division of labor is informal but still very gendered, often the question of who has control over how the children are cared for is the site of conflict between spouses. (One example I think I see a lot is Fun Dad versus Uptight Mom households, in which one parent never knows when dentist appointments are and doesn't care if the kids wear sunscreen or not and the other is prone to getting very cranky because she's in charge of figuring out how to get to all four parent-teacher conferences in two hours.) So you may well have stumbled into an area of family conflict; I really don't think it was your fault, and I think it's a good indication that these would probably have been hard people to work for. <br /><br />Does your local unemployment office have a job board? I found my first job through one of those. Also, have you applied to campus food service or other campus jobs? There are often summer vacancies where they need people to prepare for camps or conferences. Best of luck!purpleshoesnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-9517077179510162522010-04-17T21:54:22.464-07:002010-04-17T21:54:22.464-07:00Ruth,
I agree with the poster who said you should...Ruth,<br /><br />I agree with the poster who said you should use the time to interview them as much as you are being interviewed. Always ask what their expectations are (that shows you are aware that there is criteria you'll need to meet) and ask them what activities they have planned for the kids and what would their ideal nanny do in the summer. You always want to find out who is looking for a nanny and who is looking for a nanny/cook/housekeeper. <br /><br />I would apply every where. Ideally, something with room and board would be great. My first job was at 19. I put together a pitiful resume listing babysitting jobs (for a retail position) and the interviewer said he was impressed I took the time to organize that information. I admitted I'd never had a real job and he said we all have to start somewhere. <br /><br />Be honest and friendly and you'll find a job. You'll be amazed at how many people don't show up on time, don't work hard and don't care about a work ethic. It's not hard to stand out when others don't even try to be a decent employee.<br /><br />And I think it's fine that you want to stay and build a life. Eventually, you'll get an apartment and start collecting stuff and wonder where all the time went.<br /><br />Good luck!Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13646259025324966793noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-10765118276199326372010-04-17T20:15:50.662-07:002010-04-17T20:15:50.662-07:00I agree with the camp option. Partly because I am...I agree with the camp option. Partly because I am the wife of a camp director and you would be an asset to camp. I love the ministry that we are involved in and it is a fun place to be and see the Lord move especially coming out of homeschooling and Gothard/ATI as we both have done. I'm only guessing as to where you are but Forest Home, Hume Lake, and JK Ranch are some great summer camps. I will say that most camps have done the majority of there hiring and so that may not work. I wish you were her cause I need a second half nanny for our camp here at Pine Cove. Hope you find something... Praying for you.Stephanie Easthttp://theeastfamilyblog.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-27098943593545072902010-04-17T20:03:48.245-07:002010-04-17T20:03:48.245-07:00Does your area have day camps over the summer? I w...Does your area have day camps over the summer? I worked in 2 different camps over one summer, and while the pay was not great, it worked well for my circumstances. Your background with children would obviously be an asset. One of the camps I worked for was through a park district, and the other was through an association for people with special needs. <br /><br />Good Luck!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-27434959522629357462010-04-17T19:49:22.706-07:002010-04-17T19:49:22.706-07:00Ruth,
Your reasons for wanting to stay where you a...Ruth,<br />Your reasons for wanting to stay where you are seem to be healthy and normal. The job market is tough. Keep trying. You will land something.Randihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17965297688416349272noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-43902719153655768362010-04-17T18:26:21.627-07:002010-04-17T18:26:21.627-07:00Just stopping by again to ask if you have consider...Just stopping by again to ask if you have considered doing personal care (e.g., staying with older people in their homes)? If you can get a good position, that can work out very well for everyone concerned. I've found out about those jobs through word of mouth--maybe putting up notices at activity centers where seniors gather would work? In my experience, it paid as well as nannying, plus I got paid to sleep!<br /><br />Also, different ones mentioned the importance of explaining your work experience gap. This is one of the toughest parts of the journey, I think. As someone mentioned above, saying your mother wasn't well (however you define "well") and needed you at home is a good way to handle it. My story is that I worked on my family's farm; what I don't say is that my work was gardening and doing laundry and cooking and cleaning house and homeschooling siblings.<br /><br />I don't know what your professional aspirations are, but I second the suggestion to look into receptionist jobs. If you can get an entry-level position in a company that has growth opportunities, that would be awesome. Even better is one where the employer rewards hard work. (Ask about growth opportunities in the interview, so they know you're ambitious.) Doing this helped me get some strong business skills under my belt before I ever went to college--and they're still valuable in my current academic career.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-84106312686531139322010-04-17T17:36:32.056-07:002010-04-17T17:36:32.056-07:00First time poster. I agree with the others that t...First time poster. I agree with the others that the wife is the one who makes all the decisions. I have a friend that has gone through quite a few nannies and you would actually be a dream to her (she has 5 children from 1 to 10). What she usually does is give her nannies a trial to test them out before she decides. You may want to suggest that if you think they are on the fence. have you checked Craigslist to see if there are other jobs. What about housekeeping (once you are done with your cast)?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-41992288872581509752010-04-17T17:13:23.296-07:002010-04-17T17:13:23.296-07:00One of the things that has always worked for me (a...One of the things that has always worked for me (and I'm one of those people that has gotten jobs from ads, not through contacts) is remembering that I am interviewing them as much as they are interviewing me. I come off confident and not desperate. A good thing! Tell everyone you know that you are looking for a job too - they may know of something.hekateshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05248476836969662392noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-10522149271063340162010-04-17T17:11:31.709-07:002010-04-17T17:11:31.709-07:00Ruth, I think it's totally understandable that...Ruth, I think it's totally understandable that you want to stay and work for the summer O_o. I think it's gonna do real good to live amoung "us" lol ^^ Also earning money (in not too dire job) makes you feel so good about yourself ! <br /><br />Don't undermine your choices ! I think we all support you here !Sophienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-80690055167004088932010-04-17T16:38:10.379-07:002010-04-17T16:38:10.379-07:00I know someone already mentioned this but you migh...I know someone already mentioned this but you might consider looking into a job as a receptionist. I've been a nanny and several other things but the receptionist jobs are easier to get usually and being pretty works in your favor (especially at car dealerships or places where men hire) try dr's offices, car dealerships, churches and office buildings. Most of those places are usually hiring receptionists or assistants of some sort. Hope you find something soon!Kathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04217295297413419505noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-87877581101942369822010-04-17T15:26:24.721-07:002010-04-17T15:26:24.721-07:00THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU! All of these ideas ...THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU! All of these ideas and insights are helpful. <br /><br />I really don't want to go live with my brother's family (in another state) for the summer. It's expensive to fly back and forth and I want to try and get my life started here for good. Obviously, I would travel if work took me somewhere later but going back home takes me away from my therapist and my new life here (umm- Harris, my hiking friends). I know that sounds pitiful but it's true. I have a little resume but I didn't even think to put my CPR training on it so that's a great idea. I like the idea of a cover letter. Thanks again!Razing Ruthhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04854418022850278216noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-85573714912132726292010-04-17T15:24:59.841-07:002010-04-17T15:24:59.841-07:00I think you should say you started school late bec...I think you should say you started school late because you needed to prepare and save up for it (which is true). Tell them that you wanted to make sure you picked the right program and school and you're very happy to be where you are. If you add in something about the cost of school these days, people will understand. There are too many people with degrees they hate because they were young and had to decide. I have a masters and am four classes away from a second masters because I had no clue what to do with my life. It's an expensive lesson!<br /><br />If they ask, just say you are working hard toward a degree and are excited about the future. I wouldn't get into all the details because its frankly nobody's business. If they ask, use it as a strength. You know kids, you can handle a herd of them at one time, and you are a smart, organized young lady who can make a difference for the summer.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13646259025324966793noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-40487947024717892282010-04-17T15:16:16.499-07:002010-04-17T15:16:16.499-07:00You're right see http://www.eeoc.gov/facts/qan...You're right see http://www.eeoc.gov/facts/qanda.html<br /><br />Anyways, this surely is an informal job so don't think you could really go after them for that (maybe for not paying you or something).Sophienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-50562194597705722302010-04-17T15:14:10.185-07:002010-04-17T15:14:10.185-07:00I wanted to add-
Addressing your age/only being a...I wanted to add-<br /><br />Addressing your age/only being a sophomore might be a good idea if given the opportunity.(If the interviewers know how old you are) You do not want to appear "flighty" or as if you have been sitting on your parent's couch since you were 18 (which is what a lot of people would think).Nataliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06253375702367863424noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-35945351895436299922010-04-17T14:40:08.975-07:002010-04-17T14:40:08.975-07:00Side note, I believe you must have at least 15empl...Side note, I believe you must have at least 15employees to be accountable to Federal Employment discrimination laws, as well as the ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act). If I am mistaken I apologize.Nataliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06253375702367863424noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-25177705750329447802010-04-17T14:25:59.400-07:002010-04-17T14:25:59.400-07:00Hi Ruth,
I agree with all of the commenters sayin...Hi Ruth,<br /><br />I agree with all of the commenters saying that usually (unfortunately) most of the nannying decision are up to the mothers, because usually they are the main cargegivers/responsible AND because they can be afraid of the competition too (maybe for the children too). The fact that she mentionned it IS weird. I would be so ashamed to acknowledge it. <br /><br />Anyways, I wanted to ask something (you don't have to answer but maybe think about it). I know it's "just" nannying, but how do you feel the years between 20 and now ? As a lot of posters have pointed out, saying you're very active is important, and they may ask themselves how come you're 26 and only a sophomore... So maybe, you should turn it around and say you wanted to help your mother (because she was sick or something, staying vague should be good). I don't know exactly what you should say but plug somewhere you were not just sitting around at home waiting for your parents to kick you out... <br /><br />I agree also with the poster mentionning that this attitude against your crutches is illegal. <br /><br />I hope you find something quick, I'm sure the parents are gonna be very satisfied with you ^^Sophienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-63506497407544754912010-04-17T14:09:15.872-07:002010-04-17T14:09:15.872-07:00Hey Ruth,
I was nanny for many different familie...Hey Ruth, <br /> I was nanny for many different families for years. They are some of the most awkward interviews as the mother is sizing you up not only as a caregiver to her child but also, sometimes, as a potential threat. I had several mothers tell me point-blank that I was too pretty! Kind of a backwards compliment huh? I had a boyfriend and was not after her husband in any way!! I also had a mother tell me not to wear skirts or shorts around her husband (yeah, I quit that job after a couple weeks). Don't worry - it's her problem, not yours. Find someone more secure to work for.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com