tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post5462416332409067001..comments2023-10-10T03:57:29.110-07:00Comments on Razing Ruth: Stuck on Part 11Razing Ruthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04854418022850278216noreply@blogger.comBlogger64125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-13901008513655749332010-03-13T10:43:10.613-08:002010-03-13T10:43:10.613-08:00Concern troll for sure. Good grief.
Ruth, I am so...Concern troll for sure. Good grief.<br /><br />Ruth, I am so grateful for your blog. A friend of mine was in ATI as well and your writing is helping me understand her experiences better. Thanks for sharing your story.rachelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06443615888276700768noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-19039745908000569472010-03-12T14:43:38.851-08:002010-03-12T14:43:38.851-08:00Dave,
So that's what that was! Sheesh. Thank...Dave,<br /><br />So <i>that's</i> what that was! Sheesh. Thanks for the fyi.shadowspringhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15172112981244682382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-3605556965147962872010-03-12T13:22:26.535-08:002010-03-12T13:22:26.535-08:00Ruth,
Congratulations on your first tone/concern ...Ruth,<br /><br />Congratulations on your first tone/concern troll. That's got to be a milestone for any blog.<br /><br /><i>One belly laugh is worth a thousand syllogisms</i> - H.L. MenckenDaveLnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-69261497506132603412010-03-12T11:29:45.215-08:002010-03-12T11:29:45.215-08:00What if we ignored Daddy Darth's posts by not ...What if we ignored Daddy Darth's posts by not responding to him? Wouldn't that drive him crazy because he isn't getting the attention he wants so badly?<br /><br />Just a thought. :)Alicianoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-11462137252860225602010-03-12T10:25:47.893-08:002010-03-12T10:25:47.893-08:00Ruth, in light of Joanna's post, I'd like ...Ruth, in light of Joanna's post, I'd like to tell you that as part of the healing process when one has been abused, it is vital to allow yourself to experience anger. It is also vital for those of us who have experienced abuse to hear feedback from people about the insanity of how we lived. We need to hear the perspectives of others from many angles (and from many angels). <br /><br />Please, don't allow wanting to be nice, shut down that process. Go ahead and when you are ready, get angry. Get good and angry. And stay angry until you have worked through it. (But by all means, work through it.) The anger may last a moment, a day or a decade. In my belief, the length of time it takes is in God's hands. Trust Him with the process and don't try to shorten it so that you're playing nice. No playing nice here. Don't allow someone to misues the scripture, "In your anger do not sin." <br /><br />Would you say taking someone else's belongings is sin? Would you say destroying someone else's belongings is sin? Would you say being snarky is sin? Yeah, I know all ATI people would. Yet that is exactly what Jesus did when he overturned tables in the temple and yelled at the people. This man was ANGRY. It was appropriate anger and the religious pharases (as if I could spell Pharasee). It's OK when you feel anger and express it. Over time you'll get the wisdom to know what's appropriate and what's not. I know that sounds scary because you've been taught your whole life NOT to trust your gut. That the human heart is wicked above all things. But guess who gave you that gut? Guess who put in you that sense of right and wrong? "Don't go down that alley." "Run!" Or "It's OK, you're safe with that person." I think God did. We get into the most trouble when we stop listening to that God given gut and start listening to perverted religion. <br /><br />Please listen to your gut. Please learn to trust what God put inside of you.<br /><br />And as far as the snarkiness goes, wasn't it Paul who was the snarkiest of them all? In his time there were some relgious zealots that were preacching that in order to be saved, you must first be circumcised. Paul told them (publically and in writing that has existed for 2000 years so far!!!) that he wishes they would go all the way and cut off their... sorry, don't want to get your blog censored. And no one has gone anywhere near that far in suggesting that happen to your father. (Not yet, though I'm sure plenty of us have thought it. Probably your mother has, too.)<br /><br />EEDavishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17060423952264721851noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-52319015240194030972010-03-12T10:19:06.254-08:002010-03-12T10:19:06.254-08:00Shadowspring,
I too am a child of abuse and of a ...Shadowspring,<br /><br />I too am a child of abuse and of a codependent destructive relationship. I do not want to rescue anyone - I am not a rescuer. I am commenting on a blog.<br /><br />Please may I point out that I said I admire Ruth's strength, honesty and courage. Where have I said that I want to 'enmesh her in a co-dependent relationship' or, in fact alter in any way what she does, says or thinks? If I didn't have the greatest respect for her I wouldn't have gone on reading this and hoping that she has a much happier life now she is free. I would instead be moaning somewhere else about 'wayward daughters' or quoting scripture at her to 'encourage' her back.<br /><br />I am not counselling or dictating. I suggested that ad hominem attacks weaken a case that presumably we all think needs to be made against Ruth's father and needs to be made with all the force everyone has.<br /><br />Other people on this board, not just me, have expressed empathy with Ruth's mother's situation, and in fact, the rest of her family's situation.<br /><br />I have been made to feel guilty about getting out of my own abusive situation often enough myself never to want to put anyone in the situation of being emotionally blackmailed into going back to an abusive co-dependent relationship because they feel sorry for someone in it. Why would I try to do this, given my own history?<br /><br />I agree with you that abuse can be spoken against in any way that people want to. I simply expressed an opinion that some ways might work better than others, and that certain ways in this case might not be helpful.<br /><br />I would never approve of any moderation of reality. Abusers need to be made to face their abuse. My reason for stating my opinion about a moderation of language was because if Ruth's father is unwilling to hear anything at all about the extent of his abuse and the extent of the damage he has done, if he wants to close his mind entirely, it is easy for him to do so by focusing on how something is said, to the exclusion of the truth in what is said.<br /><br />So instead of having to see how truly despicable his behaviour has been he can focus simply on the way in which those views of his despicableness have been expressed and use anything he doesn't like about the language used by posters here to force an invalidation of the truth of what they are saying, which is that he has behaved in a cruel, abusive and vindictive way. <br /><br />I am not suggesting that any blows should be softened, any harsh reality moderated, any pretty veils be drawn over the truth of the terrible abuse that has happened her, and happens to so many. Abuse is evil, period. And 'All it takes for evil to triumph is for good people to say nothing'. Silence in the face of abuse condones and colludes with that abuse.<br /> <br />I am sorry that my views and speech are unacceptable to you. I am not trying to be noble, to be a rescuer, to allure, enmesh, coerce, or anything else: I am stating an opinion.<br /><br />Perhaps as you seem to be quite clear about my motives in commenting, and also sure of my reasons for speaking, we should agree to differ as to my motivation and character, and keep this off Ruth's blog, as it's not fair to her to engage in this sort of contention.<br /><br />As I said, I am sorry that I have not been clear enough to be correctly understood.Joannanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-36992372746915145882010-03-12T08:03:55.871-08:002010-03-12T08:03:55.871-08:00Joanna, one of the down sides of ATIA is that it r...Joanna, one of the down sides of ATIA is that it removes simple joys from life. You are made to feel guilty over every. little. thing. <br />You learn to second guess every laugh, every chuckle lest you have sinned in some way by doing so.<br /><br />When we point and laugh, we do so because we are no longer held hostage by this controlling mindset. <br /><br />I chose to be happy. I chose to laugh in the faces of those who kept me as a virtual prisoner in my own family. By extension other people who hold the same beliefs. <br /><br />I understand what you are saying but I would ask you to broaden your perspective. <br />Not all who read here are Christians. We do not adhere to the same life rules you do, nor will we stop what is normal to us because it makes you uncomfortable or Darth Daddy...not even for Ruths Mother.<br /><br />I dont pity Darth Daddy and my patience is wearing down for her mother. <br />They choose this lifestyle. They perpetrate it on the remaining children.<br /><br />The hope I would offer them is that they can still turn this all around. They dont have to lose all of their childrens respect and involvement like my father did. <br /><br />I will not coddle them (my parents or Ruths parents) like Gothard does. I will not lie to them about my disdain for the treatment and abuse of their children. They have enough people around them who are willing to fill those shoes.<br /><br />You see, Joanna, I trust that the honesty of these posters will bring real light to the lives of Ruths family. <br />That at some point, real truth and freedom will win out. I know its a stretch but I have that hope.<br /><br />We will not be doing this family favors, though, if we are not who we are. If we conform ourselves to make the abusers more comfortable.<br /><br />Its my hope that life is becoming uncomfortable for Darth Daddy. Its my hope that Ruths Mother is thinking long and hard about what is happening.<br />Its my hope that they will just let go of the need to abuse, to control. <br /><br />Gothard isnt worth losing children over. <br />He is just not. <br />I wish Ruths Mother, at least, would realize that. <br />Men like her husband are replaceable but your children...no. They are your heartbeat. To deny them love, to deny them support is messed up.<br /><br />Joanna, I would not ask my fellow commenters to be anything other than what they are, honest. <br />I would not ask you to be something you are not on this blog. <br /><br />I am who I am and I wont modify my comments to soften the blow to a man who was okay with locking a child in a dark closet for fourteen hours. <br /><br />-JennyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-37084869146555557182010-03-12T06:34:39.214-08:002010-03-12T06:34:39.214-08:00joanna, shadowspring likes contention and satire, ...joanna, shadowspring likes contention and satire, which is perfectly fine, but don't think she is greatly bothered by you! You have a different idea of how much confrontation is a good idea in an interaction, and since she thinks more is ok, you are I think perhaps mistaking her for being more upset than she is.<br /><br />I really like *both* of your points. I don't know which one is right. I tend to personally prefer the snark and satire, but I appreciated your post.jemandnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-17612760837764866472010-03-12T06:31:02.834-08:002010-03-12T06:31:02.834-08:00"the way in which it can be countered, or the..."the way in which it <b>can</b> be countered, or the way in which it <b>can</b> be spoken about"<br /><br />My whole point exactly. <br /><br />There are no rules about the way others <b>can</b> speak or confront truth. It can be countered, and it can be spoken against in any way that any of the myriad people in this world can speak and confront. <br /><br />You are not helpful, imo, in making Ruth or her posters in any way responsible for anyone else's feelings or responses to what is written here. <br /><br />Whether it is her mother (who is also abusive in that she has willingly complied with all of ATI/Daddy Darth's edicts) or the Big Cheese Himself, you are clearly counseling that people who blog here are responsible for these abusers feelings about Ruth's escape from the family cult, and that we are all somehow responsible to moderate reality so as to make it easier for them- easier to change their ways and get out of the cult themselves. <br /><br />Noble of you? Perhaps. Realistic? Not in my experience. Helpful? Nothing is more helpful than bumping up against unmoderated reality, imo.<br /><br />And I am only speaking as a child of abuse myself, <b>I am not speaking for Ruth</b>. <br /><br />I think that while your motivations seem admirable in that you want to rescue Ruth's mom, I don't see it as admirable at all that you want to rescue anyone. <br /><br />I think your are encouraging Ruth to become an enmeshed codependent when that is not helpful to anyone.shadowspringhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15172112981244682382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-28440169441947317062010-03-12T05:20:25.559-08:002010-03-12T05:20:25.559-08:00Dear Shadowspring.
I'm sorry I came across as...Dear Shadowspring.<br /><br />I'm sorry I came across as sanctimonious. It wasn't my intention. I have no desire to control anyone or anything: I was simply expressing an opinion that the more people descend to calling silly names the more ridiculous they look, the less controlled and rational and strong they look, and actually, the more unlike Ruth they look, since I don't see her descending to name calling.<br /><br />Satire is a powerful weapon against abuse:it's just important to see it doesn't backfire on the user.<br /><br />I've suffered from abuse - I don't condone it. I also work against abuse in my work.I am not in the least interested in saving Ruth's father's feelings nor am I the apologist for any sort of abuse. His behaviour is vile - what is there to argue about in that?<br /><br />Unfortunately, when you express an opinion on the internet it can be misconstrued, and I suggest that you may have misconstrued mine.<br /><br />I nowhere implied that there is any way Ruth can bring about his repentance if she is 'superspiritual'. Frankly there's only one 'person' who can bring about his repentance and that's God. I simply suggested that the name calling might not help her mother, who is obviously under pressure to put pressure on Ruth to stop the blog. Blunt, honest and polite verbal opposition to her father might be more use to her, and to Ruth.<br /><br />I've asked Ruth to check my post and take it down if she doesn't like it. I actually asked her that straight after I posted it, (and before you answered me so discourteously)as this is her blog, and she has a right to remove opinions she doesn't like. How is that controlling?<br /><br />Correct me if I'm wrong, but the comments section is enabled to allow all of us to express opinions. You're entitled to disagree with mine, obviously, but I don't think it is fair of you to class me with the abusers simply because I suggested that a little more verbal restraint in fighting RUTH's cause might be an idea. Verbal restraint does not mean less truth - it simply means truth plainly and hard spoken, without silly insults that weaken a cause and detract from the point being made.<br /><br />I too have spent my life being 'shamed, manipulated and guilt-tripped by religious meddlers'. <br /><br />That's why I commented on this blog - something I rarely do on any blog (not that I have time to read many) because I was so moved by Ruth's strength, clarity of voice, honesty of purpose and the charity with which she, who has been more injured than anyone by this man, still tries to speak about him, while maintaining her right to live as she chooses.<br /><br />I suggested verbal restraint and dignity, which does not equate to not speaking the truth strongly, clearly and vehemently, and fighting abuse wherever it is found.<br /><br />Let me say very clearly that I believe Ruth's father has abused her, and his family most evilly and cruelly - as obviously do you. Even if we differ in the way in which it can be countered, or the way in which it can be spoken about, I hope that you will accept that this is my stance, as I accept that it is yours.<br /><br />I'm sorry to cause contention on your blog, Ruth. I won't post again if it upsets so many people so much.Joannanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-41545557440564457482010-03-12T04:34:21.813-08:002010-03-12T04:34:21.813-08:00roflmao.....this is hilarious!
Joanna, I am not R...roflmao.....this is hilarious!<br /><br />Joanna, I am not Ruth but I do have a few things to say to your post.<br /><br />1) You do not control the internet.<br /><br />2) You do not control the people who post on the internet.<br /><br />3) Although you are entitled to your opinions, so is everybody else! <br /><br />4) You do not get to monitor other people's opinions anywhere on the internet except your own blog.<br /><br />5) Many people disagree with you. I am one of them. I find the snarky comments hilarious, and laughter is the best medicine for heartbreak that there is!<br /><br />6) I can't speak for Ruth, but I know in my own life, my snarky, witty, strong-minded friends who supported me whole-heartedly by pointing out what an ass my abusive parent was, they SAVED MY SANITY!<br /><br />7) Even though I am a Christian, I find your sanctimonious , self-righteous meddling highly offensive. Your last line IN NO WAY excuses your self-important moralizing about other people and the way they express themselves.<br /><br />8) Count me among those who DO NOT CARE about Daddy Darth'w widdle feelings! When I post, it is in support of Ruth against her abuser!<br /><br />9) Your comments are so typical of abusive religion- ignoring the victims of ABUSE! Lecturing them about how much more important the feelings of the ABUSER are than the mental health of the victim, and worst of all, IMPLYING THAT THE VICTIM IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THE ABUSER! You imply that he will be a changed man if somehow Ruth is super-spiritual enough to bring about his repentance. Bullsh**.<br /><br />Your entire post and the ideas expressed, the religious posturing, blame the victim, pity the abuser sentiments, disgust me!!!!<br /><br />10) Finally, your ideas WON'T WORK! Daddy Darths's whole family has been tip-toeing around him, deferring to him, spending their whole lives trying to avoid ruffling his feathers and soothing his ego- and all that accomplishes is to support the ABUSE! <br /><br />Your thinking is backwards! It is a classic example of crazy-making behavior.<br /><br />NO, being nice to Daddy Darth will not bring him to repentance! Confronting him with reality is his only hope!<br /><br />To everyone else: KEEP SPEAKING TRUTH!<br /><br />Don't soften it or compromise it. <br /><br />KEEP IT SNARKY! <br /><br />Laughter is good for all of us who have escaped from abuse, and especially Ruth.<br /><br />KEEP THIS BLOG ABOUT SUPPORTING RUTH!<br /><br />If Joanna wants to start a blog pandering to Daddy Darth, let her. <br /><br />To Ruth,<br /><br />Don't let Joanna guilt you or any of your internet friends! You have a right to be who you truly are, and to live free from being shamed and manipulated by religious meddlers. This blog is for you, and MOST of us are here to support you and you only.shadowspringhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15172112981244682382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-71585893781994168642010-03-12T04:31:55.145-08:002010-03-12T04:31:55.145-08:00Joanna,
Your point about calling Ruth's father...Joanna,<br />Your point about calling Ruth's father "Darth Daddy" is well taken. You are correct in many ways. However, there is a purpose to satire. By pointing out the similarities between Ruth's father's bombastic diatribe and the controlling voice of Darth Vader, we underline the fact that his threats are really just 'smoke and mirrors'. <br /><br />The intent is to help Ruth step back from the situation and see it from a bit of emotional distance. It is less intended to put Dad down than it is to diffuse his impact so that Ruth can think more clearly.<br /><br />I would bet that although most of us are angry and appalled at Dad's behavior, we also feel sad for the man. He is so eaten up by dogma that he has denied himself all joy. Participating in the growth and development of our children is a blessed and wondrous thing. He has so many children and has not been able to enjoy a minute of the miracle of life. <br /><br />At least for me, I feel sad because we are getting the privilege of seeing Ruth grow and change and fly on her own, yet her parents are denying themselves this joy. It is the triumph of Ruth in this coming of age story that makes me root for her, cry with her and cheer for her. Her parents have turned away from this. I am angry with Ruth's father for hurting Ruth and her sibling. But I also see the tragedy of the parents as well.Randihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17965297688416349272noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-63026444932120643092010-03-12T00:41:38.194-08:002010-03-12T00:41:38.194-08:00I hope no-one minds me posting this. I'll acce...I hope no-one minds me posting this. I'll accept any rebuke if you think I have merited it. <br /><br />I too don't like Ruth's father's vengeful attitude. But to help Ruth might it not be better if, no matter how much anger we feel on her behalf, we refrained from making fun of him by likening him to Darth Vader or being rude to him?<br /><br />Ruth doesn't do this: her speech is restrained and courteous. If we behave in a less than courteous or kindly way, we are reinforcing this man's view that everything outside his 'normal' is evil, and giving him fuel to attack Ruth (and her mother, for whom my heart really hurts: she must be so confused and despairing now).<br /><br />Those of us who follow Christ (I do) need to display His love and grace and remember to 'judge not lest ye be judged'.<br /><br />Those of us who don't (I used not to) need to show that grace, love, kindness, courtesy, truth and honour are not the preserve of those who do, but are qualities that can be shown by everyone who is human . . .<br /><br />Ruth, can I suggest that you look up 'Stockholm Syndrome' on the internet. It's a psychological state where people come to identify with their abusers because it's the only way of surviving. (I have personal experience of it.) You may find that it helps you to understand why your mother is asking you to take the blog down.<br /><br />Again, I hope I have not offended people by suggesting that imflammatory and derisive language is modified a little. One can't condone Ruth's father's violent and vicious speech and actions, but one does not have to emulate the language to reprimand it.Joannanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-60101535579919394892010-03-11T23:33:15.105-08:002010-03-11T23:33:15.105-08:00Isn't it funny? Who has all the power now, hmm...Isn't it funny? Who has all the power now, hmm? It's Ruth. Why? Because "daddy" (because he wasn't/isn't really a dad, more a tyrant) is going nuts not being able to control Ruth. Now he's trying to bully her through the internet.<br /><br />Ruth, by the time your youngest sibling is 18, your parents will be in their 70's, yes? That will make it much easier (hopefully) for escape.<br /><br />To quote Stuart Smalley (a character created by Al Franken when he was on Saturday Night Live): "You're good enough, you're smart enough, and doggone it! People like you!"<br /><br />Oh, another part of cultural catch-up would be to watch Saturday Night Live - even the "bad years." It is a *wealth* of pop culture info & satire, along with political satire as well. <br /><br />Stay strong, Ruth.Alicianoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-36134282512256351152010-03-11T22:59:48.514-08:002010-03-11T22:59:48.514-08:00Daddy Darth is set in his ways. It doesn't mat...Daddy Darth is set in his ways. It doesn't matter how we react. In his mind, we are all wrong and he is right. So we should simply respect his belief's. He can't understand that most of us believe in and love God. And I guess that he thinks that God will forsake all of us, send us to Hell for all of eternity because we are not following Bill Gothard. <br /><br />Really, after 2000 years, God deigned to speak to us through the teachings of Bill Gothard? <br /><br />God loves everyone. He welcomes everyone. Jewish, Muslim, Amish, Buddhist, Catholic, or Atheist. We all have our own belief's and our own relationship's with our personal God. <br /><br />I'll see you in Heaven Daddy Darth. You did the best you could. I did the best I could. And while my best may have gone against everything that you believed was wrong, there is no way God wouldn't welcome me.Not really sure yethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13198216643308722984noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-86958834281601513352010-03-11T19:56:30.035-08:002010-03-11T19:56:30.035-08:00Matthew 11:6 "Blessed is the man who does not...Matthew 11:6 "Blessed is the man who does not fall away on account of me."<br /><br />Ruth, you are NOT pulling anyone away from Christ. If anything, your love for your mother, your protection of your siblings, and your grace in dealing with your father reveal your Christian spirit.<br /><br />Matthew 19:14 14 says, "Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."<br /><br />Think of this verse in terms of your father and the prayer closet. Wait, maybe you shouldn't. My point is that for every verse your father can post about obeying, there are at LEAST as many talking about the love and light of God, and grace to sinners.<br /><br />I hope you'll have a chance to share these things with your mom someday. I can hear some of your sadness and grief, as you clearly love her. <br /><br />SunnySunnyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14277418576713140861noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-14019492803093960962010-03-11T13:02:21.763-08:002010-03-11T13:02:21.763-08:00I've been thinking about your situation Ruth a...I've been thinking about your situation Ruth and wanted to chime in and agree with the others that you need to save yourself first. You have a right to live your own life in the way you decide works for you. You are allowed to make yourself your priority. Please don't feel guilty.<br /><br />One thing abusive families do is mire you in the FOG (fear, obligation and guilt). Darth Daddy has tried fear and obligation without any luck and now he's working on guilt. <br /><br />The abuser relies on everyone playing their roles so he or she can control and dominate. They use the FOG to keep you in line, keep you oppressed, keep you abused. By pulling away you have left your assigned role and there's nothing an abuser dislikes more than when one of their victims seeks autonomy and a life of their own. Your mother's tears are tears of her own shame as she has been complicit in your abuse by standing by and doing nothing to save you or your siblings. This is nothing more than guilt thrown at you at your father's bidding.<br /><br />If she truly loves you and wants what is best for you she will let you live your own life by your rules. She's just perpetuating the FOG. I know you love her but don't be fooled by her pleas to toe the line. It's a shame that a woman as educated as she is has allowed herself to be so broken by a man who claims to love her. Maybe if she sees you succeed she might be able to find the courage for herself to leave. <br /><br />It's never too late. <br /><br />I write this as much for her benefit as yours. <br /><br />Thanks for the Harris update. he sounds like a lovely person and a wonderful friend!Krisnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-2922431561075589072010-03-11T12:31:11.389-08:002010-03-11T12:31:11.389-08:00How did your dad find your blog in the first place...How did your dad find your blog in the first place?<br />*********************************************************************<br />I was wondering that too, isn't he supposed to only look at "encouraging" and "God honoring" ATI approved media? Or does that rule only apply to women and children?Marie Francisnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-83624516071905203052010-03-11T10:29:17.723-08:002010-03-11T10:29:17.723-08:00How did your dad find your blog in the first place...How did your dad find your blog in the first place?Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12409793235676670706noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-35717618026585277182010-03-11T08:54:44.529-08:002010-03-11T08:54:44.529-08:00Hey Ruth, if you are stuck on Part 11, perhaps you...Hey Ruth, if you are stuck on Part 11, perhaps you could go back and maybe explain where your Dad came from. How he ended up in ATI. I'm very curious who he was before he met your mother. <br /><br />Of course, this is assuming none of this would out him or your family.Lauren H.noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-20748112624424050482010-03-11T07:51:07.252-08:002010-03-11T07:51:07.252-08:00Ruth, God loves you! You are not leading people a...Ruth, God loves you! You are not leading people astray. I am no less dedicated to Christ than I was before I found your blog. You've also given many Christians the opportunity to get the word out that Christianity is not ATI. :)<br /><br />Ruth's father: as a conservative Christian woman, I repudiate your representation of Christianity. And if you think a woman's opinion is worth nothing, then be sure that my husband would be disgusted by you as well. It wasn't anything Ruth said but your own foolish posts on her blog that gave ample evidence to the fact that your motivation is not "walking in the light" or obeying God but getting people to bow to you and your whims by force or manipulation. For shame.<br /><br />I am so thankful to have married a man who has the humility to recognize his own faults, and who does not see the Bible as a stick to beat other people with, most especially not his family. From the very beginning my husband has taken seriously God's command to men to love and care for their wife as they would their own body. He pays attention to God's command for *him* to honor, care for, and cherish his wife. God's command to me as a wife is between God and myself. The Bible does not tell a husband to force his wife into obedience or subservience. And in regard to children it specifically commands a father not to exhasperate his children or be harsh with them. I would say Ruth's stint in a dark closet rather blatantly violates this direct command, and that's only one instance in many years of fatherhood. <br /><br />My husband is not perfect, and neither am I. We struggled a lot in our early years but his heart, unlike yours, was open to the Holy Spirit and he was not too proud to make changes. Perhaps people on the outside might look at our two families and see many similarities, but there are some huge, essential differences. Mainly the existence of selfless love, and a demonstration of the fruits of the Holy Spirit by my husband, that are all apparently lacking in your relationship to your wife and children. You will be a lonely old man indeed if you do not repent of your arrogance and abuse.Margaret/CappuccinoLifenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-12744519263549638632010-03-11T07:12:45.272-08:002010-03-11T07:12:45.272-08:00Wow.
Un-freakin-believable.
How can Darth be so ...Wow.<br /><br />Un-freakin-believable.<br /><br />How can Darth be so CLUELESS?!?!?!<br /><br />The evidence is all around him. The happy family ATI promised is a farce. Instead people in his family are oppressed, depressed, hard-pressed and miserable as they slowly come to the realization that Daddy Darth has been BAMBOOZLED!<br /><br />Flim-flammed! Conned! Ripped off! Decieved! <br /><br />The ATI promises are in the end vapor-ware. Following Bill Gothards teachings has not resulted in peace, contentment, unity and joy.<br /><br />It is destroying the hearts of his entire family: husband (what a caricature of a human being HE has become!), weeping wife, children desperate to get away, terrified to do anything to take up for themselves or make life better.<br /><br />All that ATI promised is a lie.<br /><br />Face it, Daddy Darth. Bill Gothard has screwed you over royally.<br /><br /><br />Ruth, beautiful Ruth, precious Ruth, we are all praying for you, supporting you, sending loving thoughts your way, and cheering you on. It is right for you to LIVE! It is for freedom that Christ has set you free. Stand fast, therefore in your new freedom, and do not be entangled again with the yoke of bondage. <br /><br />(I have never heard or seen anything that looked more like the "yoke of bondage" than being in a relationship with Daddy Garth. Yuck!) <br /><br />Stay free, Ruth!shadowspringhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15172112981244682382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-64015982783073583072010-03-10T18:46:32.127-08:002010-03-10T18:46:32.127-08:00We've got more light on this list than ATI eve...We've got more light on this list than ATI ever thought about having. We can pray circles around any vengeful, bigoted, mean-spirited church group any day.<br /><br />I have been praying for you, Ruth, and Ruth's Dad, since my first reading of a Dad venom-spew. I pray that Ruth continue to see the love that motivated her family to come together. I pray that Dad be as holy and blessed by God as he thinks he is. <br /><br />I pray that you, Dad, meet face-to-face with the God who is the Source of all Truth and Love. I pray that you are so filled with the Light of God that everyone around you sees the afterglow. May you have to put a veil over your face as Moses did after he saw the Lord on the mountain. I pray that you have such a full and deep experience of Love that the hideous, clawing, aching fear that pours out of you in such rage and violence is transformed by that Love into pure and precious peace, joy, kindness, gentleness, humility and self-control. May you radiate the Spirit of the Holiness even more than you now radiate the Spirit of Self-Righteousness. <br /><br />God loves even you, Ruth's Dad. May you know that so deeply in your soul that your life becomes a by-word for grace.Sandra Keehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16979912092987681396noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-78230952000435502022010-03-10T18:05:57.954-08:002010-03-10T18:05:57.954-08:00Oh look, yet another Daddy Darth post filled with ...Oh look, yet another Daddy Darth post filled with "look at me, look at my power" narcissism. Seriously, you disgust me. It's people like *YOU* that originally drove me away from the church, you self-righteous asshat. Yes, that's right, people like you with your fear-mongering, Bible-thumping hell fire drove me away from church for a long time. I became Pagan! It's only recently that I decided to give God another try. And what did I find? True Christ-like people who care about me no matter what I do or who I am. Want to know who those people are? PEOPLE LIKE RUTH! In fact, Ruth's blog has led me to be closer to God than I have been in over a decade. So as for her leading people away from Christ? I'm sorry, but for me, she's doing the exact opposite.<br /><br />Walking in the light and umbrella of authority? What kind of light do you walk in? It has to be a black light because it sure as hell isn't the same light I see. I bet you only have that umbrella of authority to keep the sun off of your skin because you'll probably burst into flames the second you step into a sunbeam. Wait, that's it! I've figured it out! Daddy Darth is in fact a vampire! Now that we have discovered your true identity, take your umbrella and your ass-haberdashery and go back to the darkness where you belong. Stupid prat.<br /><br />Ruth, you are such an inspiration to so many of us here. But please make sure you take care of yourself first. I know that you might feel like you're being selfish, but you can't help others if you don't take care of yourself. I know you care about your sister, and you want her to experience your precious freedom. But still, make sure that you look after yourself before you start looking out for someone else, even your own blood relative.<br /><br />*big hugs* Keep getting the truth out there. The world is hearing your story, and we love you.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16562255692750879831noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-50946112607233101932010-03-10T17:18:44.085-08:002010-03-10T17:18:44.085-08:00Ruth,
I wouldn't worry about driving people a...Ruth,<br /><br />I wouldn't worry about driving people away from Jesus. Actually you've probably driven me closer to Jesus, I've never been so happy to have been raised a Catholic then after reading what this supposedly Christian group believes. As for "walking in the light" I'd love to go at it with Ruth's father about the validity of our two religions, cause frankly he hasn't got much to stand on. <br />(To be clear, I'm not saying my religion is the only correct one, I actually think most religions are just different paths to the same destination, ATI/Quiverfull as it is describe in this blog, however, appears to lead somewhere else...)Marie Francisnoreply@blogger.com