tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post8516730154197876257..comments2023-10-10T03:57:29.110-07:00Comments on Razing Ruth: UpdateRazing Ruthhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04854418022850278216noreply@blogger.comBlogger102125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-5792456016082429212010-08-19T20:36:05.077-07:002010-08-19T20:36:05.077-07:00It's late, I know that, but my two cents if yo...It's late, I know that, but my two cents if you read this:<br /><br />You're not naive, you're inexperienced. There is a difference. You're not going to know everything - you never will - and given your upbringing, it wouldn't be surprising if you were a little behind in the School of Cynicism.<br /><br />Without being too armchair pop psychologist, it does sound as though Jack is a good guy, and there is something else going on in their marriage. Is Jill a total whacknut? Hard to say. It does sound as though she wasn't being rational at the time though, and hadn't been thinking rationally for a little while. Maybe because of marriage stresses unknown.<br /><br />I agree that a friend is a friend, regardless of gender. I've always had more guy friends than girls, and it's never bothered me. People who have problems with cross-gender friendships are projecting their own problems and insecurities onto them.<br /><br />In the end, this is no doubt something that you've learned from. Count me as one of your supporters offering you a hug and encouragement. You're not perfect, but then again, neither am I. :)Tae_Ki_Girlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02823742349810916837noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-63182956289708765622010-08-10T18:54:33.772-07:002010-08-10T18:54:33.772-07:00Ruth,
Just checking in, hoping everything's o...Ruth,<br /><br />Just checking in, hoping everything's ok. :o)<br /><br />And, something my mom told me in college:<br /><br />"Sometimes the jobs you have are more valuable because you learn you DON'T want to do that job anymore." <br /><br />I pass that on to you. Sometimes what you're good at isn't what you want to do. <br /><br />I wish you many many good things! Hope all is going well!Freedom & Lighthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07134200632688608733noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-83221146035690550872010-08-08T07:25:17.137-07:002010-08-08T07:25:17.137-07:00Just an idea and probably a bad one considering th...Just an idea and probably a bad one considering the problems you have with your leg, however, I want to suggest to you that you might also look into waitress jobs where you are tipped. I worked my way through 4 years of University this way, paying for my tuition, car expenses, room and board and only left school with $10,000 in student loan debt. I'd say that's pretty good without scholarships. (note this was in the 80s) My point being that while a library job is good consistant work, a weekend waitress job in addition isnt a bad idea. That is if you're physically capable. Best of luck to you.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-378851880458963202010-08-05T19:57:19.786-07:002010-08-05T19:57:19.786-07:00Oh. Nevermind, then. :pOh. Nevermind, then. :pAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12409793235676670706noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-76762795304088442492010-08-05T11:15:24.393-07:002010-08-05T11:15:24.393-07:00Lainey, yes, last year WAS her first year of schoo...Lainey, yes, last year WAS her first year of school....she was a freshman..granted a 25 yo freshman, but a freshman, nonetheless.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03293754839064886803noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-56891568485602328062010-08-05T09:35:14.152-07:002010-08-05T09:35:14.152-07:00Hey Ruth, last year wasn't your first year of ...Hey Ruth, last year wasn't your first year of school, was it? What did you do last summer?Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12409793235676670706noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-13310700361840230602010-08-05T04:59:03.441-07:002010-08-05T04:59:03.441-07:00Ruth,
Years ago when my children were small, I had...Ruth,<br />Years ago when my children were small, I had occasions to hire a person to help with my children. Most of the time, it was because I needed to work. The only time I did not pay the person was the one time we went on a one week vacation and brought a young girl that we knew well. We paid for a plane ticket and for admission to a theme park. we also gave her spending money as we would have our own child. But she was only 16 and therefore, she was a child. We also got made legal arrangements to obtain healthcare for her if it was needed.<br /><br />We never had the sort of drama that you had, but there was always tension. Many of the folks did a fine job and cared for my children in good conscience, but differences seemed always to occur. I think it is the nature of the kind of work it is. You are caring for someone else's children. That said, I think that Jill needs to do some self-work. <br /><br />In the final analysis, you were in a tough situation and the set up mostly got you through the summer. Chalk it up to experience. See if you can get state medical coverage. Look at various housing options so that you do not have a housing issue in the summers. Look into a part time job during the school year for some extra cushion moneywise.<br /><br />It is time for the next adventureAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-5387326457605659522010-08-04T19:45:57.092-07:002010-08-04T19:45:57.092-07:00Yeah...it is comments like this:
This is starting...Yeah...it is comments like this:<br /><br /><i>This is starting to become some RR cult and I don't blame Ruth for that.</i><br /><br />...that inspire the snarky responses, Version 2.0.<br /><br />I confess to being uncomfortable with the kneejerk psych evals of Jack-Jill.<br /><br />But if the plan is to waltz in here, post insulting, mean-spirited, negative attacks on Ruth for the sole purpose of undermining her confidence and progress...it is troll behavior and it gets called out.<br /><br />If our responses are what constitute an incipient "cult" mindset...then standing up for ANY reason reflects cult mentality... by your lights.<br /><br />Ease off. And I do get that I used provocative, offensive language...and will do better in the future.Ahuntnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-55573074885891181512010-08-04T15:52:28.094-07:002010-08-04T15:52:28.094-07:00A CULT?!?!?! LMAO, honey, you obviously don't...A CULT?!?!?! LMAO, honey, you obviously don't know what a cult REALLY is.<br /><br />No, some of us just think people who always have to be negative and try to bring down those who are already struggling are just losers. That's all. Maybe we can call ourselves "The Cult of the Decent Human Beings"?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-77448208451292344562010-08-04T15:05:10.964-07:002010-08-04T15:05:10.964-07:00i'm sorry you had to get into the middle of th...i'm sorry you had to get into the middle of their marital dispute. obviously, their marriage had issues and it really wasn't your fault that any of this happened. it's hard to work for a non-communicative couple (or industry!) but that's often how it is in real life. i've had jobs where one person told me one thing and another told me the opposite and i was expected to make both of them happy... yeah, leaving is about the only thing you can do when you get caught up in that sort of situation. i also don't believe there was anything you could really do to foresee that without being excessively nosey.Iktomihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06764173102454691516noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-35766841153258853982010-08-04T11:52:46.945-07:002010-08-04T11:52:46.945-07:00*rolls her eyes at 2.0s rant*
I find it curious t...*rolls her eyes at 2.0s rant*<br /><br />I find it curious that the last person I can recall being so angry over the support shown to Ruth on her blog is Darth Daddy.<br /><br />We may not always agree with each other in the comments but general folks are quite decent. <br />The exception to the rule would be Ruths family, ATIA-er, and random trolls...folks like 2.0 who jump in with the hand slapping to dumb down the conversation.<br /><br />How lame.<br /><br />Ruth, if you do go to using a more filtered comments set up, Ill get an ID.<br /><br />-JennyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-8947863063643936192010-08-04T09:25:16.565-07:002010-08-04T09:25:16.565-07:00Ruth is a grown-up and a smart cookie, and I think...Ruth is a grown-up and a smart cookie, and I think she can protect herself against drive-by idiots while leaving the anonymous option open for current and former ATI-ers in her situation, for whom it might not be safe or at least wise to comment under an identity. Even registering an account under a pseudonym can be terrifying to those in abusive or patriarchal environments.<br /><br />Ruth, I don't care what kind of sheltered life you led, you did what I and anyone I know would have done if we were about to become homeless -- accepted employment, and made it last the majority of the summer to boot. Whatever environmental limitations you came into adulthood with, I'd say you've licked the majority of them. Truth is, most of us don't know what the heck we're doing from one phase of life to the next; we're all just winging it. I know you're continuing to work on the baggage from childhood, and you should really should be proud of yourself -- you're doing great!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-36144157026721964682010-08-04T07:17:42.353-07:002010-08-04T07:17:42.353-07:00I post under my google account as well. On other ...I post under my google account as well. On other blogs I've posted as anonymous because I don't have an account to use. So it's not just about trying to be anonymous. Of course, I am not a troll. Even if I did doubt Ruth, I'd never be so rude as to post nasty comments. I think that she should seek out workers comp if she needs it, as I've said. That was a good point too that it was an illegal eviction, I wish I'd have thought of that myself.Boysmomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02484085135905423794noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-85212652423075842662010-08-04T06:36:30.454-07:002010-08-04T06:36:30.454-07:00What Cynthia said.
If you're gonna say it, ha...What Cynthia said.<br /><br />If you're gonna say it, have the courage to identify yourself. You don't have to use your real name, after all.<br /><br />I think closing a blog to anonymous comments is reasonable. In publishing, even positive letters to the editor have to include identifying information if they are to be considered for publication.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05143106528944373459noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-7413820927007888732010-08-04T06:18:01.198-07:002010-08-04T06:18:01.198-07:00I started the Troll comments. I have encouraged R...I started the Troll comments. I have encouraged Ruth to let the blog remain open to all posters, but when someone comes on as anonymous and does a "hit and run" post that does nothing but attack, it's fair game to be labeled a troll. <br /><br />People can say "wow, I grew up in ATI and this wasn't my experience". But the people who refuse to post with a consistent name and who offer nothing but deconstructive comments don't deserve my consideration.<br /><br />I post everything under my google account. Why can't these people have the courage of their convictions and come out from hiding?Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13646259025324966793noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-44528869766770148782010-08-04T04:34:46.297-07:002010-08-04T04:34:46.297-07:00::engages in good faith::.
A personal blog is not...::engages in good faith::.<br /><br />A personal blog is not a scientific paper or journalistic publication; generally, personal attacks are considered as rude as they would be in a conversation, not as rude as they would be if they were letters to the editor or speculation about a tv character. I certainly hope that we aren't jumping all over people whose opinions wouldn't be rude if they were said out loud at a dinner party, but I think we can agree that no one would walk up to a woman at a dinner party and tell her she always needs to be rescued by a man and is probably having an affair with an employer. I admit that this particularly tugs at my sentiments because the average personal blog is locked down against anonymous comments, because the average blogger understands that people on the internet are sometimes jerks for no good reason - it gives some people a thrill. I've not seen anything that we've jumped all over that could be construed as constructive, with the exception of us getting all righteous about labor law - a stance, I would note, that Ruth hasn't posted any opinion on.<br /><br />I do agree that Ruth doesn't need us to troop around the internet on quests for vengeance against other bloggers - she hasn't asked for such a thing, and we're not Free Republic.purpleshoesnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-71981064094734803032010-08-04T01:23:34.438-07:002010-08-04T01:23:34.438-07:00This is starting to become some RR cult and I don&...This is starting to become some RR cult and I don't blame Ruth for that. If somebody doesn't agree with every comment here, then it's a troll?? <br /><br />For your information (I am Anonymous 2.0) I believe RR is telling her story, I have sent her money on more than one occasion and I feel horrible that she was exploited as an unpaid nanny this summer. I wish her the best. <br /><br />I still think we could stay on the subject here and not start accusing another blogger of being a mean stalker with a mental illness.<br />If anonymous 1.0 has an issue with some other blogger, I suggest that she can discuss it on that blog and not bring her fights here.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-57471627528915976532010-08-03T21:53:13.030-07:002010-08-03T21:53:13.030-07:00Uhm...a little discrimination, plz?
Trolls who s...Uhm...a little discrimination, plz? <br /><br />Trolls who seek to hamstring a brave young woman who is struggling to build an adult life w/o the basic tools the rest of us were given...education, work experience, family support, etc...are rightly called out on their BS.<br /><br />Other speculations are appropriate in that Ruth has less in the way of life experience, and should protect herself. My own sense is that concerns about Jack are a little over the top, BUT...my guess is that Anonymous Version 2.0 would be the first to blame Ruth if something bad did happen.<br /><br />Stuff your criticisms, Anonymous Version 2.0...we'll call out the trolls as we damn well see fit, starting with YOU.Ahuntnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-89236067718039763352010-08-03T20:08:12.083-07:002010-08-03T20:08:12.083-07:00Talking about "diagnosing people you don'...Talking about "diagnosing people you don't know", "Anonymous Anne" isn't the only one doing it (if she IS doing it). How about the people on this blog quit "diagnosing" Jack and Jill (why not Hanzel and Gretel, or Ike and Tina) for that matter and shut the hello up. Quit picking on posters you don't agree with and calling them trolls. <br /><br />Seems to me that some people here are no different than the cultists Ruth left behind. Apparently, if one doesn't participate in "groupthink" and echo the same sentiments as your typical know-it-all 20 year-old, then one gets attacked by volassa raptors...err, I mean "posters." Some of you posters give "mean girls" a run for their money. Take your bad selves and blank off. Thanks.Anonymous Version 2.0noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-87562046056883174522010-08-03T17:19:08.611-07:002010-08-03T17:19:08.611-07:00Anonymous Anne at 11:26 is probably the same perso...Anonymous Anne at 11:26 is probably the same person that left a very mean comment on the blog she is referring to. <br />You clearly have some issues and I suggest that you take your private fights somewhere else and don't diagnose people you don't know.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-42909380084104630752010-08-03T11:26:19.394-07:002010-08-03T11:26:19.394-07:00I have a pretty good guess at who the troll in que...I have a pretty good guess at who the troll in question is. She's a narcissist, fond of tearing Ruth down in front of people who don't keep up with this blog. When you visit her own blog, you're struck by a picture of her own face so big you have to scroll past it to see any text.<br /><br />I'm glad Harris was there for you, Ruth. It sounds like there is a lot going on beneath the surface of that marriage, and I'm hesitant to place all the blame on Jill's shoulders. For all we know, Jack could be a hopeless philanderer whom Jill can't trust around other women. Or he could be really cutting when speaking to her and put up a veneer of niceness with people outside his family. Or she could just be a bitch. But please, let's not take their relationship at face value.<br /><br />-AnneAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-61211169094658283922010-08-03T09:34:09.737-07:002010-08-03T09:34:09.737-07:00I like Sam's idea. It might dissuade trolls fr...I like Sam's idea. It might dissuade trolls from posting if they knew you'd know where they were posting from.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-88756597021847180022010-08-03T06:59:27.221-07:002010-08-03T06:59:27.221-07:00If you don't want to close your comments to th...If you don't want to close your comments to thhe anonymouses, maybe you can put one of those widgets on your blog that lets everyone know the posters generic location.... ie poduck, arkansas or that they came here via Jane Doe's blog.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-11315900875891422902010-08-03T05:03:20.392-07:002010-08-03T05:03:20.392-07:00Ruth, you know, many people lock their blogs down ...Ruth, you know, many people lock their blogs down against anonymous comments. I don't think it's silencing debate to do so, even if it means I have to go get an OpenID. People have a right to have every opinion in the world; that doesn't mean it's censorship not to invite them into your living room to have them; the same rule holds for blogs. Not everyone (as you have found this week!) is prepared to engage with topics honestly or reasonably.purpleshoesnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2201165796329163117.post-57491378906738500142010-08-02T21:45:51.054-07:002010-08-02T21:45:51.054-07:00I also forgot to add to my post above that I had t...I also forgot to add to my post above that I had to go to the ER just for myself 3 times in 4 months. Ovarian cyst, kidney stone, concussion. I thought the ER might post me on a secret list for hypochondriacs hah. But all of these things were real. I am lucky to have insurance, but a lot of people don't and injuries disrupt everything. Just another thought I wanted to add.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com