Sunday, February 21, 2010

I'm fine!

I hope this posts. I've been having trouble getting logged in because of a change in the school's server (or something like that) and too many log on attempts for google e-mail. I think I'm on now though.

I'm fine. I'm safe. I've been trying to get well after the tonsillectomy problems and then catching a virus. I'm also trying to get all the labs/work I missed caught up and that's taking most of my blog time.

With regard to my dad's posts, I'm not sure they've all been my dad, as I previously thought. I've had time to reflect on some of the earlier comments left and I think it may have been a family member, but not my dad. I do think my dad is responsible for showing people my blog and getting my family involved in the latest rounds of comments but the older ones might not have been him. I don't know now. Without giving it all away and compromising safety, I have taken numerous steps to protect myself from physical threats but I don't think the comments left on the left post were meant to be a physical threat. It was scripture that was quoted often in my house. If anything, those specific scriptures were his way of letting me know it was really him. Does that make sense?

"Ruth Mary", to answer another question, was a sibling's way of making sure I knew that the comment was from family. It gave it away actually. Mary is my middle name.

I'll try to get part 7 and 8 to Vyckie at NLQ as soon as I get caught up with life. Thank you for your concern and advice, all of you! I hope this posts!


  1. Hi, Ruth! Thanks so much for letting us know you're safe.

    Speaking only for myself here: I didn't take the stoning rant as a direct physical threat, but it says a lot about the ranter's dangerous state of mind. That it was quoted frequently in your house makes it even creepier.

    Can you confirm at some point that Ouachita, from your last post, is your brother? I've no reason to suspect otherwise apart from general wariness of trolls, but it might avoid confusion. (Of course, if this would interfere with privacy, no need).

    I hope you get some peace soon in which to relax, study, and try out new ice cream varieties. Team Ruth will be praying you some hedge clippers. Maybe a chainsaw.

  2. Hi Ruth! So glad to hear from you but sorry to hear you still not feeling well. I know you must have lots of work to catch up on but try not to overdo it. Take care.


  3. Thought this might be of interest to you:

  4. I know the stresses of being behind in college due to illness and the trickiness of getting caught up. I'm happy that you are safe and I hope that you will live your life the way you want it. I am thankful for you because you bring the truth about quiverfull and ATI.

  5. I too, got the stoning "threat" all the time, and I never feared that my father would actually kill me. It was "just" his voicing his frustration that he couldn't fully control me, and probably feeling less of a man b/c he was not able to do something such as stoning.

  6. Hi Ruth - I was happy to see your posting today. Sending you continued wellness vibes and hope you get caught up on everything soon! You remain in my thoughts!

  7. All the best to you, dear Ruth. I have kept you in my prayers this past week and am so glad to know that you're safe and (on the way to) well.

    I'll continue to keep you in my thoughts and prayers and look forward to your sharing of your story, as you have time. I only wish there was more I could do to support you!


  8. Hi Ruth! I'm sending you lots of happy and healthy thoughts. Take care and pace yourself while you get all caught up on school work. Then when you're all caught up, treat yourself to something. You deserve it!

  9. Happy to know you are okay. (((HUGS))) and {{{HEALLING}}}

  10. Take care. So glad to you know you're okay and just busy. I feel better, oddly enough, knowing the scripture was something you've heard before. But even better knowing you've taken concrete steps to make sure you stay safe. As others have said, we're all rooting for you and are here whenever you need some support. Good luck with the catch up schoolwork. I'm sure you'll get it all done!!

  11. Very glad to hear you are ok and taking steps to protect yourself!

  12. So, so late to this, but from a lurker: I'm so glad you're okay and taking steps to stay okay. You can make up schoolwork, but we can't make a new you. <3


  13. The fact that [stoning passages are quoted all the time] does not make it right, normal or safe. It speaks hatred and retribution. Don't be fooled into thinking all is well. If things were normal, this blog wouldn't exist.

    All it takes is one willing person with a non-negotiable religous ideal to put wheels under the words. Thoughts to words to deeds.

    It's easy to forget this when decompressing from an environment of unacceptable thought and behaviour into normality. It is especially difficult when this involves family whom we want to love and trust.

    You need to be wise as a serpent and gentle as a dove.


  14. Whew! I'm so glad to hear you are safe; I was getting worried when you weren't posting for a while. Hope you are feeling better, and I hope you know that though I don't post as often as others, I still cheer from the sidelines :D You are a real woman!
    As for the "fake name", it's smart. I do the same thing. Stay strong and stay safe!
    The Girl in the Pink Dress

  15. So glad you are are healing and getting well. Please take care of yourself, mentally and physically. Right now the important things are your safety and your schooling.

    Every time you post, I'm more impressed with your strength. You keep going!

    Thinking of you.

  16. Thanks for keeping all of us doting mother hens up to date on your health and safety. I'm SO glad you're being smart about taking care of yourself, in all areas of your life. I have to say, it boggles my mind that an individual who is as completely and utterly devoid of basic human compassion as your father, could produce such an incredible young woman like you.

    Hang in there, kiddo. We're all behind you. :-)

  17. I agree with Annie. It may seem innocuous to you, but in hind sight, things like this always did look that way. Please, mention this to authorities. Get a restraining order or something. That is just frightening. You trusted them, and look what they did to you! Can you *really* trust them? It's all about control, and he thinks he's still in it. Don't let him be.

    God gave you two feet to stand on, a finger to dial the police, and police to protect you. Please take the first step to ensure your safety. You are worth it.

  18. I am so glad that you are safe and doing well!

  19. Glad you're safe and doing well. I hope you feel better soon. Take care and please keep the school authorities up to date with the latest information. The 'stoning' threat/scripture may be old hat in a fundie world but in the real world we take such things seriously. Clearly your father's reality is not the same as everyone else's.

  20. I saw on FJ that you're looking for a laptop. I'm not registered there so I thought I'd pass along a couple ideas:
    -refurbished is a good idea, just do some research first on the best brands for that
    -netbooks, basically smaller laptops, may work for what you want; cheaper, portable, but sometimes not too fast if more than one program is going
    -post to a campus listserv and on boards near the mailboxes, cafeteria, compsci dept, etc. that you're looking to buy because many students get new computers when they come to college and may still have the old ones
    -talk to a compsci prof about possible rental options, buying an old school computer, if they know any students or staff looking to sell, etc.
    Good luck, and I'm very glad you're OK!

  21. I do not know what school you go to but some colleges offer a program through student services that can provide a laptop to certain students that are considered at risk for not finishing college. Basically you qualify for this program if neither of your parents finished college themselves. I wish I could remember the name of the program-but your student services department would know about it if they offer it.


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