Thursday, October 29, 2009

Belief

I was reading TWOP this morning and saw something that caused a mini-melt down. There's a picture of Jana Duggar being "blessed" by Bill Gothard, followed by a podcast with four of the Duggar girls.

If you're disturbed by the things you heard on that tape, you aint' heard nothing yet. That's the tip of the iceberg. I've been to those Gothard camps and what's publicly disclosed in materials previews and things like that podcast is only the beginning. You go in to these camps, if you had never been before, thinking that you'll enjoy fellowship with girls who live the same way you do and you are scared. Why should any girl be scared to go to camp with other girls, you might ask? It's simple. IBLP or ATI girls are supposed to be perfectly sweet, perfectly virginal, and perfectly submissive to higher authority and any normal person knows that this is an impossibility. Despite the sickeningly sweet voices and doey eyes: girls are girls. Since leaving, I've seen depressed, self-mutilating anorexics who have more self-esteem and senses of self-worth than girls I went to camp with. Take a girl from birth and tell her that she's inherantly sinful and worthless unless she is a "jewel in the crown of her father" (heavenly and earthly father). They don't say, "Be good because being good leads to better choices." or "Be careful about who you love because those choices are important." They say, "You were born with sin. If you don't fight the sin that lives inside you, then you will not be worthy of God's love and you'll end up in hell." They say, "If a man looks at you with lust, it's your fault. Ask yourself what you did to cause him to look in such a way." I have a study guide from one of those camps and I want to share what's on one of the worksheets.
Ask yourself the following questions...
1. Have I ever attracted the attention of a man and felt good about it?
2. Have I ever encouraged a man to look at you by styling your hair or face enticingly?
3. Have I ever worn an immodest style of dress to be noticed?
4. Have I ever returned the advances of a man knowingly or unknowlingly by my words or actions?
5. Have I ever wished to have a man's touch?
6. Have I ever wished a man would be tempted by my beauty, intelligence, or countenance?

It continues until you reach question twenty. It concludes with this...
If you answered "yes" to any of these questions, then you have allowed yourself to be manipulated by Satan. Satan has entered your heart and mind to entrap you and the person you sullied with your selfish, foolish vanity and pride...

Those camps taught me that women were the cause of all that was bad with the world. The only way to redeem our souls was to completely subjugate ourselves to God. In lieu or God, the men in our lives would fill God's role. Having children was another way to begin balancing your spiritual checkbook. By having children, you were fulfilling God's command and adding warriors to the "most righteous army of God".

It doesn't matter if Jim Bob doesn't allign himself with the Quiverful "movement". He's ATI, Gothard, and IBLP. Here is what a man within that movement believes.
He believes a woman's body is not her own. It belongs to the Lord for His purposes. They frequently site the book "Our Bodies, Our Selves" as a Satanic tool because it gave women the belief that they had control over their fertility and a right to do to their bodies what they desired.
He believes children are a blessing because they can serve God. He believes he should have at least six children to fill his quiver.
He believes his wife and children should be obedient and that he is obedient to the Lord. He believes the commandment of children to obey their parents, but most fled the beliefs of their own parents.
He believes in restoring "Christian principles" to the United States and the World through any means necessary.

Where is the reality in 18 kids and Counting?

13 comments:

  1. Ruth,
    I am Scarlett45 from TwoP and I decided to come visit your blog to see what you had to say about the Podcast- WOW. Thank you for your writings. All I can hope is that the Duggar girls (and girls in their situation) find a way to be happy. Reading your post made me feel so sorry for every young woman that ever had to go through that. I think your blog is an inspiration and a help to those who desire more information or who may be tempted to leave the movement. Always best to you Ruth.

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  2. Oh, dear, I answered "yes" to all the questions you posted. I guess Satan has manipulated me. Crap. Whatever shall I do?

    Oh wait--I'm an atheist and don't believe in Satan. Never mind. lol

    Thank you for writing this post. It was very interesting, and gives an insight into the Duggar's lifestyle (I came here from TWOP too, but I am not a member and only lurk and read). It's a lifestyle that I've always felt there was more than they say on TV, just beneath the surface, but I guess it's not viewer-friendly.

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  3. He believes in restoring "Christian principles" to the United States and the World through any means necessary.

    Oh please, those people do not believe that.

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  4. Hi I was directed to your blog from TWOP have you been on the long no longer quivering blog? You should contact Vickie the lady who runs it because she used to be involved in the quivering lifestyle with homeschooling, long dresses, and all and her journey is interesting as her and her children live a normal life that they didn't have in the quiverfull movement. She may be someone worth contacting since she knows what you are going through more than anything
    www.nolongerquivering.com

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  5. "If a man looks at you with lust, it's your fault. Ask yourself what you did to cause him to look in such a way."

    And that, my friends, is what we in the feminist community call "perpetuating rape culture".

    Yes, I'll be honest, I identify as feminist, because retrograde behavior like this still exists and it sickens me. I also identify as agnostic for lack of a better word, but that is no judgment on anyone else, save perhaps when a self-styled Christian movement behaves in such an un-Christ-like manner to its women and daughters.

    All that said, if you Ruth wish to read and compare more detailed analysis of rape culture, there is a very good post on fugitivus.wordpress.com ("Another post about rape"), but fair warning, it's very confrontational and, as I'm sure you can imagine, might hit close to home.

    Peace.

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  7. Im_in_PR, don't tell me that's not what "they" believe. I used to be "they" and it is exactly what "they" believe. I have been at Gothard's feet during his lectures on the evils of modern America and how to "get back to our roots". Have you? If you want to say, "not all QF or ATI believe this", then that's acceptable, but I know what my family, and the Duggars, believe in this topic. Before the show started, the Duggars had links on their website to a Gothard lecture about this topic.

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  8. Where's the "blessing" picture? I agree, you should write for No Longer Quivering....

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  9. I'm In PR also needs to Google Doug Phillips and the Vision Forum.

    It is absolutely what the patriarchy movement is up to -- rearing an "army of warriors to take back the country for God."

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  10. can you post the links of both the picture of Jana being "blessed" and the podcast link?
    Thanks for sharing your story

    ~Katie~

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  11. Bless your heart. Keep it up, Ruth, because you are not only doing yourself a world of good through this blogging therapy, but you are obviously reaching out to others and educating others. I grew up in Greenville, SC, which is the home of Bob Jones University (yikes, they are scary and cultish enough), but I still had never heard of the "Quiverfull" cult until a few days ago.

    I am so thankful that I grew up in a "secular" household... Well, it was traditional and we did go to church, though I have now rejected Christian teaching because frankly it is completely misogynist and more than a little contradictory. I am so grateful I was taught the following by my father: A) I can do anything and be anything that I want to be, B) I am just as good as any man and I can do anything a man can do (except urinate standing up without worrying about making a mess LOL), and C) I should never have to depend on a man and I should make my own career and way in the world. Now that I am older, married, and have a child, I see the wisdom of what my father taught me... Yes, I'm a feminist. Yes, I love my husband, and I'd do just about anything to make him happy. But they'd have to burn me at the stake before I'd admit that he's any better than I am or before I'd agree to "submit" to him and "God's will." U

    I'm so sorry that you grew up in this abusive cult. But you now have taken the opportunity to get yourself out of it and make something of your life. You are a very brave, intelligent young lady and I applaud you!

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  12. Former ATI/IBLP student chiming in here to comfirm that Ruth is accurate in saying "He believes in restoring 'Christian principles' to the United States and the World through any means necessary."

    I have sat through many a staff meeting, conference session, and small-group meeting with Mr. G or one of his followers, and that is EXACTLY what they do believe. They cloak it pretty well, most of the time, but it's there.

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  13. Way way behind, but: I wouldn't wanna know any girls that thinks no is the correct answer to any of those questions.

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